The 1st day after, was kind of eventful.  I had just as much paperwork to do (execept it was my own paperwork).  My phone was just as busy (but I wasn’t talking equipment) and I dang sure wasn’t bored.  I got a lot done, but not enough.  Then about 4 pm, I smelled rain, I heard lots of thunder and I heard two lightining crashes.  I finished welding and came out of the big barn and smelled smoke.  I looked to the East and in a severe drought like this, when you see smoke, you immediately think like Ralphie on Christmas Vacation,  “OOOOHHHH  FUUUUUDDGE!”  Except fudge wasn’t the word that I thought.  There was a fire 1/2 mile East of us and the wind was blowing from the east.  This meant that there was a blacktop road between us and having nothing.  It didn’t look good.

      I called Wyatt Kelln of the Shattuck Fire Department.  He said, “Fargo’s on it.  But Arnett, Gage & Harmon are already in route.  Shattuck will be there to put it out.  Don’t you worry.”  

      In the meantime, my favorite neighbor, Johnny File, pulled up and said, “Do I need to help you move goats or just sit back and watch this crap burn?”  I looked at him, then looked again as I realized that he wasn’t wearing a cap….or a shirt….and now, I was a little nervous if he had anything else on.  If you know Johnny, then, trust me, there is humour.  I realized, at this point, that Johnny had been sitting outside, half dressed, in his wheel chair, when this fire started.  He didn’t give a rat’s ass, but if he needed to do something, “By GOD”, he was ready.  I said, “Johnny, if that fire crosses the blacktop, we’re Effed.”  He said, “Don’t worry about it.  Because as soon as Shattuck gets here, it will be out.  Did I ever tell you about the time that me and my brother’s stole a fire truck?”   No, but you have my attention.   

     He was right.  There was a great turn out of volunteer fire departments…all of the above, as well as Woodward showed up and limited this deal to a couple hundred acres.  But it was evident when the boys from out west showed up.  Wyatt and Tyler drove in a little faster than most would in a 6 wheel truck holdling 2000 gallons of water.  We heard the  jake brakes going off, well before we saw the truck.  Nonetheless, the volunteers had the fire out, with a little help from a change in wind direction.  No loss of structures or animals.  It did burn right up to the blacktop.  Of course, Tammy thought, “What the hell?  One day on his own and he finds a way to start a fire.”  I didn’t do it.  Lightning did.  

      What Tyler?  Yes, that Tyler.  Tyke’s unpaid hired hand that helps with goats, twins, emptying ice chests and has a mustard story.  At least Wyatt and Tyler stopped back at the house for a well earned beverage before heading west to fill up.  Rural volunteer fire departments are a GOD send when needed and at times, an overlooked neccesity.  Thank you to everybody that serves on a volunteer fire department.  And for that matter, thank you to all fire fighters.  Ask my brother Jake, but I have always had a rule about donating to firefighters.  It’s a good thing.  

     It is a bittersweet day on this fine Wednesday.  Today is my last day at Western Equipment.  It’s taken several months of getting stuff wrangled around, loose ends tied up and things put into place but the day is here. I’m done and now the goat business is very serious around here.  Yes, I will be chasing goats full time.  It is now a business.  Have a good day.

     I do like having visitors to our piece of paradise.  You might learn something.  For instance, Saturday afternoon, we had a family in from western Colorado and a family from central Kansas.  The family from Colorado was happy with their online purchase and wanted to look around. No problem.  I’ve got a really good kid, out of a proven doe, but he is bow-legged on the front end.  RIght now,  I would term him Un-Merchantable.  We’ll see if the new advice works or not.  I”m going to try it.   If he straightens up, he’s good.  If he doesn’t–sale barn.  

      The other problem….A kid from Kansas showed me a pic of a south Texas wether that he had purchased.  He looks good.  Real good. But, I haven’t seen him in real life. The breeder of that goat hadn’t been on my list of stops.  But, I might have to change my plans.  

     I’ve got a lot of important stuff to say.  But, I realize, that I really just need to shut the heck up and not say anything.  What I can say, is that I really enjoyed watching the Preakness today.  That jockey wasn’t working the whip, the horse was responding quick and he had a lot of gas left in the tank.  Three weeks is a long time and there are horses that are trained just for the long run at the Belmont.  The odds are not in California Chrome’s favor.  But I like it.  

       I like a good horse race.  I could REALLY like it if I lived closer to a track.  Tyke went with me to a track ONCE!  He has a a story of a local black guy, betting the local’s advice, winning, buying ice cream and beer, some fake ones, more betting, more winning, of course….more beer.  That hotel was nice.  BIG bathroom.  Big enough that Duke would NOT get in the bath without a swim suit and a snorkel.  “That tubs too big to be a bath tub.  I’ve got to go swimming.”  He was 4.  He did cannonballs off the side of the tub.  The Dragon Lady was a little bit pissy.  Nonetheless, that was a fun day at the tracks.  

      It’s a good Saturday night.  Not real good.  Just good.  I hope everybody had a good to really good Saturday night.  

      A lot of people question my intelligence, but I am the smartest person in this household.  I have proof.  22 years ago, the Dragon Lady and I got married.  It was an extravagant ceremony with lots of family and friends.  Hhmm….maybe not.  It was legal though.  

      Just think of the lack of intelligence on her part to say “Yes” to me.  Yes, it should have happened two years previous, but at that time, it wouldn’t have worked.  We didn’t do things exactly as they should have happened, but somehow, it has managed to work.  Somehow, we raised a good daughter.  And we are working together to try to raise a good son.  There are even positive signs that we might be getting that done.  

      How about this conversation:  Ernie to Helms–“How about this Dragon Lady?  How did Kelln pull this off?”  Helms—“Ernie, all I know is that ol’ Kelln married up.”  

Once again, Kenneth Helms would be correct.  I did marry up.  Way up!   If at any time you people want to question my intelligence, just take a glance at the Dragon Lady, shake your head and think, “Well, somehow, he tends to get what he wants.”

      I just hope that she holds together/ages as well as I have.  (there is a lot of sarcasm in that previous statement).

 All I really know is this…when you google the word LUCKY, the first listing should be KELLN.  That low rent, dumb donkey hit the lottery and has managed to keep it together for OVER 2 decades. 

     Here’s to all of you that have stayed together, raised kids, and managed to keep it all together–for better or worse.  It isn’t easy (for her) but it’s all good.  

P.S.  Here’s a big tip of the cap to anybody else that shares this anniversary date.  Especially those that remember to text/call/email a reminder.  No names mentioned.  I’m just glad to be here to help.  

     Sometimes it is hard to tell what are rumours, what are facts and what is just plain old BS or gossip.  I have managed to find myself in a shit-storm of all of the above.  Some is true, some is not.  Some is just pure coincidence. Some is speculation.  And a whole bunch of it is just gossip, hearsay and BS.  

      It wil take me some time to sort through all of this.  Tonight is not the time.  

      What I can tell you is that the weather is beautiful on this Wednesday evening.  NO wind!  

I have plenty of work ahead of me.  

Quad goats aren’t fun.  

Tammy’s niece, Mattie, is now a 3 time ALL STATE.  2 in softball and 1 Academic all state.  I’m dreading her graduation because if they list ALL of her accomplishments, it will be a long night.  

It really, really needs to rain.  

Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot are growing.  The barn kittens are growing.  And Ammo would really like to get at the rabbits and the cats.

Sasha isn’t moving as fast as she used to.  

A pond going dry is not a place for ex-show does to try to walk.  Let’s just say that at least 4 does are covered in mud and I probably ruined a pair of shoes dragging their dumbasses out of the mud.  

The hay guys aren’t making very many bales per acre.  

It was a nice evening watching baby goats run, skip and jump.  The sprinklers are keeping some grass alive.  And we are one day closer to the next adventure.  

Be thankful for what you have, the opportunities in front of you and the people around you.  Pray for rain.  Have a good day and a better tomorrow.

crickets……

     It’s gotten real serious around here.  Where to begin?  On Saturday, my friends Bill Taylor and Brandon Bruce assisted me in a trip to Carnegie, OK.  We took two 24′ gooseneck trailers.  We stopped at Schneberger’s and looked at goats.  Good set of goats.  NOTHING was for sale yet.  Yet being the key word.  If you aren’t in a good mood when talking to Jared, then something is wrong with you.  You clowns need to go visit this deal. Good goats, great kids(his kids are killer funny), just pure fun.  Helms has a story that you can’t make up and is just plain funny.  

     We then headed kind-of south of Carnegie.  We pulled those trailers into Teddy Harrison’s.  We didn’t pick up all 119 (how about that #?)  We picked up 75 open does.  I will go back and pick up the other 44 and their kids in the very near future.  When I heard that Teddy was going to sell out I was intrigued.  I called him and asked how many and how much?  He told me what he had in mind.  I said that I couldn’t be there until the next day.  I showed up, looked and then said, “How much for all of them?”  He asked, “Are you serious?”  I said, “I’ve been known to use large trailers to move large #s of goats before.  Yes.  It would just be easier.”  His reply, “Hell yeah! I wanted this but I will take this.”  My reply, “Can I leave them till the wheat pasture gives out?”  Teddy’s reply, “”Hell Yeah!  They ain’t costing me no money on pasture.”  Hand shake. (like all deals should go down) “Do you want a check now?”  “Hell no.  Pay me by the head as we load them.”  

     WTH?!  Kelln hates does.  Why would he want a 119 more beasts that he dislikes?  

       It’s simple math.  I can’t make more good kids without more good does.  I’ve got plenty of buck power, but needed more action for Dirt, Rumour and Rainman. Teddy has a strong doe base that is young and stacked with Hang 10 and No Way doe kids.  I’ve been watching what the Hang 10 females have been doing for Jared and Teddy.  These are some really good females.    This is a nice set of females that has a tick different genetic path than my current deal.  As an added bonus–there isn’t no BS with Teddy.  He has records on them, there isn’t a chance of him lying as far as genetics.  They are what they are.  I wish that Teddy wasn’t getting out of the livestock business, but things have changed where it wasn’t easy for him to take care of stuff.  I wasn’t looking to do it quite this way, but here we go.  When you see an opportunity, take a second to digest and then pull the trigger.  Oh and I can vouch for the fact that Teddy don’t jew.  He knew what his stuff was worth, he wasn’t out-of-line, and that’s what it was going to be. Done.  

     Now what about the kids?  As of this fine, effing WINDY Sunday Mother’s day, I have now agreed to buy them also.  Have I mentioned that it has gotten serious around here?  

     Study your genetic lessons.  Regardless of species.  Everybody is always looking for that bull, boar, ram or buck to make an immediate splash.  But sometimes, it’s like throwing a big rock into a deep pond.  There is a splash, but then after it subermerges, there is that bigger 2nd kerplunsh that shoots water up.  That’s what a female sire does.  Meyer 734 in the cattle world is the benchmark of a female sire.  Hang10 is proving to be a top shelf sire of females that will match up to 191 lines and WIN. I wanted…I got.  It may not work.  But I wouldn’t bet against it.

      We loaded 75 open does and headed north.  HUGE thanks to Brucey and Big Bill for helping me vaccinate and worm.  I don’t care if you are a coach, ag teacher, whatever the hell.  A person is only as good as their help.  And I’ve bragged on here about my help before, but like the classic Whitesnake song, “Here I go again”.  I’ve got the best help.  PERIOD.  I told Teddy that I brought some help.  If you don’t know him, well, he makes me look tall and I’m 5’9″.  He sat in his golf cart and he looked at Brandon, Bill and Jared ( all big boys–not fat bastards–just 6’+ and they haven’t seen 200lbs since jr. high)–“Damn, Kelln, do you need this much beef to back up that mouth of yours of just to get $h!t done?”  I just need stuff done.  

     I’ve had better Fridays, but I’ve dang sure had worse.  Work was good because I like the people there.  But….tomorrow is going to be better.  

Duke and I burnt horns on a set of kids tonight.  Not fun, but it went well.  I can tell you this much, when the Duke is wanting to get a job done, there is none better.  He and I are having more moments that don’t involve talking, or any verbal communication…just actions.  For those of you that know me, It is a common deal that I just want to get stuff done.  And I may just roll my eyes, growl, groan and just do it without any help.  Duke has the same affliction.

      Speaking of afflictions,  I read an article that proves that people who cuss are more honest.  This research shows that cussers have nothing to hide, don’t care what others think and THEREFORE, are more honest.   

      No, I did NOT do the research.  I just saw it on the XM radio and read it on the internet.  It has to be true.  I guarand@mNtee that it is right.  Who the %uc* would know more about cussing and honesty than me?  Effing NOBODY!  Th@t’$ who!  

      The radio deal did list actual researcher names.  I think that there is some truth to this research.  But, I also bet that no matter what cause, you could find research to support your theory.  

      Here’s my newest theory.  I am real sure that I would rather have the mis-spelled last name of KELLN than have to make a reservation and use SCHNEBERGER as the sign in name.  Or Schovanec.  Is that spelled with a….”Oh hell!?  Just call me Bob and get me seated.” 

      That’s the great thing about my name– I only have to worry about one vowel.  i do like it when somebody comes in the store, looks at my name and says, “You related to the Kelln’s in Shattuck?”  My common reply, “You ever see that name, spelled like that, anywhere else?”  The answer is always the same…”NO”.  Well, there you go.  

     Yeah, it was a Friday.  Monday is going to be a big, steamoing pile of…….let’s just stick with Friday evening.   Monday will show up, no matter what.  Some days are just better than others.  

     Stop for just a second and say a prayer for  all of our soldiers and veterans.  They did it so that we don’t have to.  Hats off and cheers.  Here’s a little Kelln rule…Never miss a chance to buy a beer or pick up a tab for our men & women that are serving.  SALUTE!   

     Tomorrow starts a whole new chapter.  Maybe even chapter 119.  Or at least the start thereof.  Here’s to you and all that matters. Good day.  

      I don’t have a movie or a song that ties to the word “Serious”.  But it has gotten real serious in my part of the world.  On a whole lot of different levels.  Let’s change the subject.

       Some days, things get more serious than others.  I got my haircut today.  I’m a  lot like the Ray Stevens haircut song,  “When you get a haircut, be sure you go back home.”  I still go back to Waynoka to a great American barber, Darrel Gosney to get my haircut.  I’m pretty sure that he turns my hair gray, but he has clippers with a vacuum on it.  I love it.  I don’t care what the cut looks like.  It is a serious deal to just feel comfortable.  

      Sellilng goats is a serious business.  I have no complaints on tonight’s sale.  Some brought more than they should, while others didn’t bring enough.  As long as they go to good feeders, it all works out.  

      This gardening deal is serious business.  Some of the taters have been sprouted for weeks.  No problems.  Planted some maters last week.  They are already gone.  The rabbits ate them smooth off.  So, in a serious move, Duke lined the garden with some woven wire.  Then he came into the house to catch Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot.  Yes, it is serious business when Foot-Foot and Foot-Foot-Foot have jumped the cage and are loose.  I’m not sure if they are tame, wild rabbits or really wild, tame rabbits.  No matter, they are seriously cool and can’t believe that Duke and the Dragon Lady kept 2 of these rabbits alive.  

     This weekend gets serious around here.  I need to pick up some goats.  I need to work some goats.  I need to get somebody hired.  Tammy goes to California for Mother’s Day.  

     Thanks to all who bid or bought in tonight’s sale.  Thank You.