World Champion

In the goat show world, anymore, I’m not sure what would qualify as a world champion.  However, I have recently encountered a world champion.  Not that it was identifying itself with a big belt or trophy.  I have wrestled this champion for almost 35 years (so that rules out the Dragon Lady for you smart asses).  This wrestler almost always wins.

I enjoy a good wrestling match.  Okie State is wicked awesome!  But this one ain’t fun.  This champion is known as a blower hose.  It doesn’t matter if it is a Sullivan’s, Hamm’s, cicuiteer I, II or III,  no matter what the hose is a son-of-a-gun to wrestle.  Put it in a trailer–you have to wrestle the hose to get it right.  Back of a pickup–watch out–the hose will twist around and scratch some paint.  Just carry it from the barn to another barn–the hose is always twisting, lurking, reaching out and getting ready to pin somebody to the mat.  Anybody that has ever moved a blower and its hose understands this wrestling match.  I’ve probably mentioned this before, but…..

Years ago, I heard an old-timer say that he didn’t want a parachute if he ever jumped out of an airplane.  WTH?  Nope.  He just wanted a set of welding leads or an extension cord as those things always get hung up on something.  I’m pretty sure a blower hose would fall into this same category.

This toe deal is not fun.  I did go to the orthopedist on Monday.  He studied X-rays, then looked at my toe and foot.  He allowed that it was healing nicely and we had two options.  1–knock me out, reset the toe, use pins and a plate, several weeks with a boot and crutches, prevent infection and no guarantees that it would be straight.  2–don’t do crap and have a toe that is always signaling a left turn.  Yes, I am fine with a crooked toe.  I think that I will call that toe, Clyde.  Left turn Clyde!  I know, I know, it was always a right turn with the orangutan.

Anybody that has ever had a toe injury has not made fun of me.  But, several have tried to come up with names as I scoot around on a gimped up foot.  My favorite–the Hobbling Hobbit.  Even though my size 10, B width feet look more like Gollum’s.

Time to shuffle off to bed or a couch.  I have had enough for this day.  Time to get ready for tomorrow and a better day.


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