Life is wonderful here at the Kelln Kompound.  We had over 8″ of a wet snow with NO wind today.  Finally, a chance for some moisture.  Of course, the cold sits in and the wind machine fires back up the rest of the week.  I hate how does can destroy fence.  Recently had a flush baby committ goat-icide (It’s always something new).  But, then I get an email from my beloved daughter.  

     The email was a link to the Rolling Stones magazine top 50 SNL skits of all time.  First, I read Rolling Stones every time that I am in an airport.  I always like the cover and the stories that they tout.  So, I buy an issue, read part of it, then I am upset with myself for wasting $4.99 Us $5.99 Canada (maybe I have that price ass-backwards).  They lure me in, then I don’t even remotely agree or am amazed at how poor of journalists that they use to write their stories.  Once again, I was lured in, but I somewhat agree with their list. Kind of.

       SNL.  Saturday Night Live.  I loved watching it when I was a kid.  I really loved it in the mid 90s.  It still has its moments and will have more in the future.  It runs in cycles.  Think of the people that have made their name on SNL.  Murray, Akryod, Meyers, Belushi, Martin, Murphy, Crystal, Hammond, Fallon, Spade, Hartman, Sandler, Ferrel, Farley, Chase, Radner, Curtin, Fey, Poehler, Rudoph and Shannon.  Put the first names with those last names and then laugh as you think of their characters.  Mary Catherine Gallagher, Mr. Robinson, Gumby, Two Wild And Crazy Guys, the Church Lady, Buh-wheat, etc. How about Dennis Miller or Norm MacDonald doing the newsdesk reports?  Tina Fey as Sarah Palin.  The political satire is second to none.  

     Think of the guest stars with Alec Baldwin’s “Schweddy Balls” recipe, George Wendt and the crew doing “Da Bulls and Da Bears”.  Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey. The show has held up to the test of time.  True genius.  

     My problems with the list.  Where to begin?  Top 50 and NOWHERE in the top 50 is John Belushi as the samurai.  There are at least 5 episodes worthy of top 50.  Not a one.  Eddie Murphy as Gumby.  Come on!  Mary Catherine Gallagher–superstar!  Not a mention.  They used the wrong Will Ferrell as Alec Trebek doing celebrity Jeopardy.  The one with Sean Connery, Burt Reynolds (Turd Ferguson) and Frenchie Stewart is an all-time classic.  John Goodman as Linda Tripp and Molly Shannon as Monica Lewinsky was classic.  Not a mention.  Dana Carvey doing Ross Perot.  Nothing.

      The Dan Akroyd “Bass-o-matic” skit should have been higher.  TIna Fey as Sarah Palin with Amy Poehler as Hillary Clinton needs to be in the top 10.   Eddie Murphy doing Mr. Robinson’s Neighborhood X-mass special made the list.  “I’d like to be your neighbor.”  Go back and watch Eddie Murphy skits on SNL.  That dude was killer funny.  Then made great movies.  Then, well that is a different topic.  

     My real problems with the list–the Assassination of Buh-wheat–has got to be in the top 10.  Joe Piscopo as Ted Koppel and Eddie Murphy as Buh-wheat.  It patterned a live news feed to a T.  Right up until you realize that it was Buh-wheat that got shot.  

     Huge Problem–Eddie Murphy as Stevie Wonder and Joe Piscopo as Frank Sinatra singing “Ebony and Ivory”.  Classic.  NOT on the list.  How did they get away with the racial & handicap tones that they sang all over?  I mean,  “I am dark and you are light.”  “You are blind as a bat and I have sight.”  Both portrayed their character convincingly and it was funny.  Top 10–NOOOO! These clowns didn’t even list it.  Google this one and watch it.  Still Funny. 

     Next Problem–Will Ferrell playing the cow bell is listed at #9.  Too low.  Google the word “cowbell”.  Search results #2, 4 & 5 mention this skit and the need “for more cowbell”.  Christopher Walken was killer in his role as the music producer legend in this skit.  Ferrell was so good that his co-workers couldn’t keep a straight face.  Downloads of the actual song “(Don’t fear) The Reaper” by the Blue Oyster Cult spiked as a result of this skit.  This skit belongs in the top 3.  “I’ve got a fever and the only prescription is more cow bell.”  Classic.

     Buh-wheat sings the hits.  “Wookin pa nub”, “Unce, Tice, Fee Times a Mady” and my favorite “????”.  For sure top 10.  

     I don’t have a huge problem with the #1 SNL skit according to Rolling Stone.  It has Chris Farley as Matt Foley–motivational speaker.  I love this one.  “I live in a van, down by the river.”  I really, really like this one.  David Spade loses composure during this skit.  I think it is top 5 all-time.  But I don’t think that it is Farley’s best.  

      My personal favorite and, therefore the best one would be Patrick Swayze and Chris Farley as the final two in a Chippendale’s dancer try out.   Part of it is sight gag–I mean, Swayze with the body of a Greek god and actually a trained dancer and Farley with a body–mass, in– spandex.  The part is well written–RUSM?  Even the judges act likes it’s a close decision.  And the fact that Farley can actually bring it with his dance moves.  It’s better than a fart joke.  I will laugh every time I see it.  I laugh just thinking about it.  

      I consider myself an expert on this topic.  When I’m a little upset with does or just had a crappy doe, I mean day,  or just want to watch something without thinking about it, and I’m not in the mood to read about politics, economy, John Deere, FFA, etc….well, then I have been known to watch on VCR or DVD, the greatest SNL skits of Will Ferrell, Adam Sandler, Eddie Murphy, Chris Farley, etc.  I love Bill Murray, Chevy Chase and Dan Akroyd skits and movies.  They came close to replacing the late, great John Belushi with Chris Farley, but, whut-oh, same result.  

     I don’t have a very long bucket list, but drinking beer(S) with Adam Sandler and Will Ferrell would be on that bucket list.  Notice the S is capitalized, as in plural, in parantheses which according to algebra means multiple.  Maybe, my daughter in LA can work on that.  And I need to bring friends, because once they meet my friends, they will have a HOST of NEW characters to deal with.  Think about it.  Sandler, Ferrell, Kelln, Milligan, Big I, Big Bill, a goat, Tyke, Leroy Bookstore, another goat, Mikey, Poe, a van, Schoovy and maybe a talking goat and with proper product ad placement dollars spent well, some other goat related people.  I’m only 42 now, so according to my genetic calculations, Kela has 57 years to get this wish done.  

      Here’s to my favorite daughter for sending me an e-mail that caused me to waste several hours of my life watching this list, realizing that this magazine should have contacted me for the right list.  My recommendation to all–Watch these skits, get in a good mood and be happy.   It works for me.