One of the biggest pains in dealing with does is trimming hooves.  Some does never need their hooves trimmed, some need it 2 or 3 times a year.  It isn’t fun. It is time consuming and I usually end up using a lot of unacceptable language, only get a couple of does done, get mad and then go do something else.  

     I have found a new way to take care of the hooves on mature does.  Pay somebody else to do it.  Way better deal.  Tim Dunkin is who referred me to this lady.  And I am glad he did.

     If you need hovves trimmed, call Stephanie Allen at 918-938-1427.  She is in college at Okie State.  She will travel to your farm and go to work.  She does an excellent job.  She tries to coordinate several farms in the same area on a weekend and then go to work.  She charges a fee to pay for gas, then so much per head, depending on how many you have.  I think that she works too cheap.  I’m a big believer in tips if somebody does a good job.  Call Stephanie, catch does, let her trim hooves, write her a check, be in a better mood.  It is a way good deal.  

      Plus, I respect the fact that here is a young person that isn’t afraid to go out and earn a dollar.  She isn’t waiting on some handout.  She’s out their earning her way.  

TGIFriday.  I’ve had some good times in several TGIFriday restaurants over the years, all involving goat people.  Kela and Danielle Litzenberger always made Susan and I take them to TGIFridays in OKC and Tulsa while at goat shows.  

     The weekend is upon us and I am a little stoked (even though I am going to work tomorrow).  I’ve got lots to do, a desire to get things done and a chance to do better tomorrow and even better yet the next day.

     I absolutely love watching cool animal videos.  I don’t know who made this video, produced it or how they got all of the different camera shots but the following link is WAY GOOD!   The terrified looks, the hair coming off as it dives for the hole in the tree, the suspense of it’s over now, NO, wait, RUSM!?   Krazy Kool.  And yes, the kids can watch it.   Duke and I even let the Dragon Lady watch it with us.    

https://www.youtube.com/v/XBEyCr5AoIs

   And in the spirt of Friday night, you have to have some tunes playing.  Google 2 guys cellos.  There will be several videos to choose from.  Watch them play AC/DC “Thunderstruck” , Guns N Roses “Welcome to the Jungle” or Johnny Cash’s “Hurt”.  These 2 clowns are exceptional.  They take a normally boring donkey orchestral instrument and light some fire to it.   Lots of talent.  

     How cool would it be to stand on the olympic podium with an olympic gold medal hanging your neck and the “star spangled banner” playing on the speakers?  

      This blog was going to be more in depth with extremely pertinent info regarding the goat industry, but my fingers got sore from a special ed texting session and now, I can’t operate the keyboard.  All I have to say is, like the Billy Idol song from the 80s, “Mony, Mony—Ride the pony”.  Good night and good day.  

     It looks like the bar has raised for online sales.  I looked at the reuslts of that California sale earlier this week and I looked at the TX doe sale for next week.  Well presented animals, properly photographed and with good write ups.  My hat’s off to those crews for doing their homework on how to do an online sale.  

     Schneberger’s aren’t fitted up, but the goats read honest and have genetics to match.  Those goats will feed and should sell well.  Did I mention that the Schneberger’s raised the grand at the KS state fair a year ago and last year’s OYE grand wether?  It looks to me like he is getting ready to screw up and sell some doe kids that he probably ought to keep.  But, you can’t keep ’em all.  Sometimes a breeder just gets sick of writing checks and decides to cash one.  

     As far as the krew at Kelln Livestock, we are sure when we might sell some of these.  We aren’t going to sell anything until after OYE.  Unless, someone wants to show up, take a look and make an acceptable offer.  Otherwise, I don’t have time to clip, shear, photo or get the animals ready to sell online.  Between work and trying to get goats ready to go show the next several weeks, I just don’t have time to get a sale ready.  I am really pleased with this set of goats, but I just don’t have the time to get them properly presented.  I’m planning on selling these online with write ups and pictures.  There are several buck prospects that will be offered, a set of does that will show that I am retarded and several wethers that will play anywhere. 

      An another note, has anybody else noticed that WIND is a four letter word?  It was brutal today.  

      I’m finally back home.  I’m a little bit tired, little bit jet-lagged, ready for my own remote control, my own keyboard but most of all just glad to be home and check the stock.  Everything was in good health and the warmer weather has treated them well.  

     This was a good trip to Phoenix.  No goats or other livestock, but a good trip, nonetheless.  I spent several hours on Monday afternoon driving skid steers–wheeled and track machines.  Deere, Cat, kubota, Bobcat, new holland and case machines.  Drive ’em like you stole ’em.  Trust me, I put all of them to the test on the obstacle course.  We sell a pile of skid steers, and I really like driving skid steers, so this deal kind of fit me.  I had fun on the drive the hell out of these machines parts of class.  The actual  classroom portions—not so much.  I’ve always been kind of a hands-on kind of person.  “Don’t tell me about it, just let me do it.”  I’m a big believer that you get better at something once you screw it up and learn not to do it like that again.  To me, that’s how you learn–by doing.  And yes, I’ve screwed up a lot of stuff.  

      It was fun talking to people from all over North America and how the winter has treated them, what they sell, etc, etc, etc.  Yes, we’ll have another round.  We’re talking business.  The weather in Phoenix was unseasonably warm.  So warm, that I felt compelled to spend Tuesday afternoon in an un-heated outdoor swimming pool.  Just a tad bit nippy, but very refreshing.  Even caught some rays on my ever-expanding mid-section and face.  

      Speaking of a gut, myself and four other co-workers enjoyed a top-shelf meal at Shula’s.  I’m not going to say that this was the best steak that I have ever had, but I will say that it might have been the best dining experience that I have had.  It wasn’t cheap, but it was incredibly tasty.  The filet was way good, the bartender recommended (not on the menu) lobster mashed potatoes were exquisite.  The salad was tasty, crisp and fresh.  The bread was excellent, but even better when used to sop up the juices left from the ahi tuna appetizer.  Let’s just say that this dinner was good–real good.  

      On Tuesday night, Caleb and I met up with my old buddy John Schoenhals at a really good mexican joint in Chandler, AZ.  John and I graduated together from Shattuck High, were room-mates at Okie State for a couple of years, then he went to ASU for graduate school.  He went to work for Intel, got married and has a couple of boys.  It was good to catch up in real life instead of via the phone, emails and texts.  Unlike years past, we were well-behaved, but it was a really good evening sitting on the patio of this diner with a couple cold ones, killer good salsa and way good freshly made tortilla chips.  

     I get texts, emails and voice messages when I am absent from the keyboard for a couple of days.  This cracks me up and it also humbles me.  At times, it also serves as an enabler.  It’s amazing that people actually read this crap, but then again I read several magazines, newspapers and internet sites that dispense crap that isn’t worthy of being on this blog.   Everything on here is the truth.  Everything–Most of the time.  

      Why don’t I post more when I am away from home?  It’s simple.  I would rather be kicked in the crotch than to type on a smart phone.  I know how to do it.  I just don’t like it.  It isn’t natural.  Thus, the reason that my texts will almost be something short.  I hate it when I get a text wanting to know how something looks.  “Really Good.”  What are they out of?  “Rumour”.   What are the mothers bred like?  

      This is where the wheels fall off.  At this point, I am done.  I will either respond “GOOD”  or “Way Good” or I just don’t respond.  If you want to know that kind of pertinent info, don’t text me.  I will respond via email when I am at my own keyboard or will tell you over the phone, but kick me in the shins as I won’t go very in depth responding to a text.  Me typing a text is like two boys kissing.  I’m just not comfortable with it.  

      Speaking of weird stuff.  My favorite daughter has taken a new job out there in LA land.  She is doing some kind of production work, (I don’t know the terminology) for some TV show that I have never watched.  She took a job with the Amazing Race.  I’ve heard of it, but never watched it.  Obviously, I am in the minority.  It doesn’t matter if I’ve seen it or not.  If she likes it and is happy, then I’m pretty stoked about it.  Now, if she ends up producing Law & Order, Sportscenter or the Cheers Reunion, then you would have me trying to get on an episode.  I can see how I could be a liability to a young aspiring producer.  I’m just tickeled/proud that she has a goal/dream and is working towards it.   She ain’t living in fear.  In the words of the great Jedi warrior, Yoda–“Do or do not.  There is no try.”  Hats off, glasses up.  Nothing but shamrocks and horseshoes to my girl out there on the left coast.  

       And speaking of kids.  I got home to my favorite son wearing a wrist brace.  Me–“What happened?”  Duke–“Fell out of a tree.”  Me–“Which tree?”  Duke–“The big one.”  Me–“Which big one?”  Duke–“The big one in the front yard.”  Me–“Why were you in that tree?”  Duke–“I wanted to climb it.”  Me–“Was there something in the tree?”  Duke–“Yep.  I was until I fell out.”  Me–“No cat, no squirrel with his nuts caught in a limb, no damsel in distress?”  Duke–“Nope, just me in a tree.”  Me–“How bad’s your wrist?”  Duke–“I can show.”  Me–“You sure?  How’s your grades?”  Duke–with excitement in his voice–“I’ve got that low D up to a real high D and it might even be a C by next week.”  Me–with excitment in my voice, “Keep the effort up.  Cs are way better than Ds.”

       Stay flexible but not limp.  It’s good to be home.   

I just spent a day at work, on vacation, digging in the dirt with new equipment that belongs to somebody else. RUSM?! I was paid to do my job. How many kids just want to dig in the dirt? I did this all day and was on the payroll.

Another day, another trip. But this time I don’t need a coat. I’m sitting near Phoenix and the temp is about 82 degrees. Compared to that negative crap I saw and felt in Moline the other day, this is alright. Over a 100 degrees temp difference. I know the goats at home are liking the warmer temps and the snow is melted & into the ground. My herdsman, Duke, has things under control. He likes taking care of the stock when there is no ice to break. I hope everyone is as lucky as I am. Horseshoes & shamrocks. Yes, this trip is also tied to Deere, but no green equipment. Just yellow iron. Everybody needs a Deere skid steer.

Saturday

      There are a lot of songs that have been written about Saturday.  We all work for the weekend. Why?  So we can work like a sled dog on OUR own stuff.  I saw several sets of goats today.  Moved hay feeders and creep feeders.  Moved a set of does & babies out of the big barn.  This set was a month old and they needed sunglasses as they hadn’t been outside.  Lots of cold weather in the past month.  

     The Schoovy’s were here with wethers.  We analyzed them and then headed to the Grainary pen to look at those kids.  We caught them all and wormed them.  There hasn’t been very many people see this set of goats, but to be honest, I like showing that set of goats–does, wethers and a couple that still have their nuts.  Part of me wants to sell them all and cash a nice check or two, the other part wants me to be like the Seelke’s and just keep them all, so I can look at them and admire them.  I’ve recently paid a feed bill, so I bet they will be 4 sale.  

      It is the time of show season, that we are now regularly working leg hair on wethers.  I think most people overlook this task.  It allows us to build leg hair which in turns adds presence of bone, allows us to clip a correct leg/pastern set and for me, it just makes a wether complete when every part is groomed properly.  Plus, the washing, blowing, combing helps get wethers used to being on a stand.  And like the rest of us, they like to feel cool, clean and like they are pimped up ready to go out on a Saturday night.  

      Later in the day, the Sweets showed up to bring Joe Dirt back home.  I always feel sorry for Dirt when he comes home.  He gets to go stray around and nail some tail, then he comes here and just gets to eat, get fat and wait for July when it is time to go chase some strange.  They also brought a buck prospect along.  That dude has a lot of good.  I don’t know if they will sell him or not, but he is good.  Lined up pedigree–191/S100 back on a 191/S100.  He is wide, correct, smooth, hog assed and has grown very well.  He was born at the end of last June, but they will have kids out of him in April.  

      We did the family facetime deal last night with our Cali Kid.  She is doing well, but has a decision or two to make.  Plus, due to the freeway drivers, she needs some body repair work done on Jeepy the orange Jeep.  That’s why we have insurance.  

     I had such a large time on my last big adventure, I think it is time to schedule another.  Stay tuned.  

is done.  I made it back to the house this morning.  Crawled my rear out of bed this morning and went to work.  I wasn’t unproductive at all, but I’ve had more energy than what I had today.  

     The Waterloo tractor factory was everthing that I hoped it would be.  You don’t have to be involved in agriculture to appreciate these factory tours.  The efficiency.  The technology. The pride in workmanship.  The product.  It was just a really cool deal.  

     Now, how did this adventure come to be?  A Gold Key tour is for customers who order their tractor or combine.  As part of the build codes, you can select a gold key tour.  When that machine is within a week of being built, they contact you and say “Your combine will be done next Tuesday?”  This happened to us last Wednesday.  

      Lance Rhodes is a former student of mine at Fairview.  He is a really good kid with a great work ethic and a strong desire to make his dreams happen.  He showed a lot of really good sheep as he won grand at Enid and a lot of premium sale lambs at Tulsa and OYE.   His younger sister showed goats for us.  Very successfully, I might add.  Meagan had a res. grand at Tulsa, a Grand at Enid and numerous premium sales.  The Rhodes family is a favorite of the Kelln’s.  Lance is nearing the ripe old age of 24.  He is involved in farming and custom cutting.  In the past several years, his high school project has turned into a growing operation.  This past fall, he and his parents made the decision that it is was better to go with new equipment–warranty, cost/hour, trade cycles, etc.    So we ordered this stuff last October.  And in the words of Lance, “Sign us up for the gold key tours because this might be the only time I get to order new equipment.”  Former student, family friends, dealer, whew!  Let’s just say that this wasn’t the easiest order of equipment that I have done.  This one involves a WHOLE lot of hopes and prayers that it will work out.  Obviously, I am betting that it will.  

    Fast forward to last week.  Last wednesday, I got notification that his combine would be done.  On Thursday, I got a call that his tractor would be done.  This is rare to have them done on back-to-back days.  The original plan involved Lance, his dad and myself going on the trip.  Well, Big Jim  had scheduling conflicts and couldn’t go.  Lance said that he still wanted to go.  I said, “A buddy of of mine and I have been trying to get to Illinois to look at some goats.”  Being the ex-stock show kid that he is, Lance understood.  His reply, “I’ll go look at a goat as long as I get to go to those factories.”  

      So I called Milligan.  A grunt, growl, a schedule change, a RUSM–the John Deere factory–I’M IN!! and he was ready to head north.  I tried to coordinate flights and rental cars.  It just didn’t work.  Look at the flight patterns from OK to IL or IA and back to OK.  Not a regular travel plan.  So, we decided to drive it.  I was originally going to take my company pickup.  Then I realized that the other two wouldn’t be covered by our insurance IF they drove.  So, I pulled the Gray Goat out of the barn.  This was a  really wise decision since I drove from Fargo to St. Louis. From there to Cabery, IL.  From there to Anawan, IL.  From there to Moline.  From Moline to Waterloo, Iowa.  From Waterloo back to Fargo.  Yes, I drove every mile.  No complaints.  I’m a way better driver than rider.  

      Now, myself and the rest of my family has a long history of using John Deere products.  Lancer obviously has a committed relationship with John Deere products.  Now, Milligan isn’t known for equipment but look at his house, ads, kids clothes, etc.  They like the green paint and the Deere logo.  Deere should use Elliott in a toy gator ad as he has literally worn the wheels off one.  If Milligan’s gator, mower or tractor (all Deere) could talk, well, let’s just say that those are some well-built products.  

       That is how the big adventure came to be.  Now, how did it turn out?  

     I have already mentioned a really cool stop at Hummel’s, saw some nice and weather-resistant bucks at Dereu’s, had a big time in Moline.  The combine factory tour was out of this world, crazy good.  Our two tour guides were retired factory workers.  One had worked there since ’66 and the other since ’72.  They were classic.  You will have to get the stories in person from one of us.  The thrill of seeing Lance see his combine in various stages of build was fun.  The John Deere worldwide headquarters is a site to see.  

       The people at the factories, headquarters and museum are great.  They all took great pride in their jobs.  I enjoyed this aspect and it became a recurring theme to stop and talk to various workers and ask them how long they had worked there.  Answers of 20, 25, 30, 35 and 41 years were very common.  We even heard a story of 60 years.  Obviously, Deere takes care of their people.  Some smelled good.  Some had cool t-shirts that started up other stories.  Trust me.  Tommy and I are loaded to the hilt with fresh, new stories from this trip.  Lance was glad that we brought Tommy along. Lance knew who Milligan was, but he hadn’t got the full version until this trip.   

       Wednesday brought us to Waterloo.  This deal ended up off the charts on the excitement level.  I got to watch Lance fire the tractor up for the first time.  Later, I watched him drive it off the assembly line.  There might be a few signatures hidden on this tractor that will surely help re-sale value at a later date.  Our tour guide at this factory was an ex-engineer.  Therefore, not as much fun as the combine guys, but full of interesting info.  The RUSM moment–with the use of the robot spray painters, it only takes 1 gallon of that John Deere green paint to cover the frame, front & rear end, engine & transmission of a 8335R tractor.  Of course, watching Milligan explain why he felt like doing the YMCA to this guy was a classic.  

        More highlights–Seeing the last 4020 ever built.  Seeing the last 4455 ever built.  In goat comparisons, this was like seeing 900 and 191 standing in a pen ready to breed.  Pretty cool.  Oh, if there only would have been a 4440 sitting there with them.  Watching a 4wd being assembled.  Seeing pics of Lance, Tommy and I wearing safety shoes, gloves, reflective vests, safety glasses and bright yellow hard hats–think Bob the Builder.  Throw in a cop and an Indian and you get Miligan doing the YMCA–HAA!  Eating breakfast at 9:30 am and then lunch at 11:00 am.  Lots and lots of art.  

      We also discovered why John Deere equipment costs more?  They have to be in order to pay for all of the forklifts, gators and tuggers used in these factories.  That and Deere equipment is better.  

        After going through these tours, I have a really healthy respect for top-shelf companies and the people that make them top-shelf.  It was great to see the pride, work ethic, desire and ingenuity that built this country.  I’m still a little humbled at how lucky I was to head out on an adventure like this with good friends.  It was my honor to chaffeur this deal.  If young people like Lance can make their dream come to realization, then it is to all of our benefit.  Isn’t that what we are supposed to be doing?    

      I wish Big Jim could have gone.  We had room.  I’m pretty sure that Lance and Jim are going to do a gold key tour in the future.  

Oh.  Did I mention that there was a casino?

Favorite quotes heard on this trip:  

    “I don’t need anymore attitude out of you.”

“I don’t know what I was doing.  I was just building cheeseburgers and it kept making noise so I cashed out.”  

“Don’t be afraid to stop at that next bathroom.”

“Aren’t the dogs cold in that box?”

“Where in the hell is that map?”

“Google the directions.”  

“There are two different levels of kept inside.”

“Did you ever….”

People, let me tell you a thing or two. First, if you are in OK or TX and think it is cold outside, well it’s not. It was -22 this morning in Moline, IL. Yes, that is a negative sign in front of that double deuce. Next, if John Deere is doing something, it will be done right. We went on a gold key tour at the combine factory this morning. This is a special tour for customers that have purchased a combine or tractor. They treat you like royalty at this tour. It is an awesome tour and the factory is a true modern marvel. The customer gets to be the first person to fire up the machine as it nears the end of the assembly line. And yes, Lance was literally given a gold plated key that will start his new combine. We then toured John Deere world headquarters and had lunch there. They do a great job on these tours and it is really cool to see. It was interesting how many employees have LOTS of years of experience. Not many former Deere employees. This tour is fit for all ages, men or women. I’ve seen and done some cool stuff in my life but this deal took a seat right at the top of the list. Oh, and another thing. It can get a little interesting on a Monday night in Moline. Especially, when Milligan gets to discussing alternative lifestyles with the staff at TGIfridays. And then, a pair of drunk Germans who claim to be ice cream machine repairmen try to join into the conversation. “You know, like machines that the Dairy Queen uses. Yes?!” Tonight. A casino in Waterloo, Iowa. Tomorrow–the legendary John Deere tractor factory gold key tour. I’m like a little kid on the night before Christmas. The big adventure continues.

My traveling companions and I have traversed across the frozen tundra also known as Illinois. We actually saw the thermostat get to positive #s. Little bit chilly and big piles of snow. Speaking of positive, Lance Rhodes (yes, Big Jim’s son), Tommy Milligan and myself made it to Hummel Livestock. Other than they have piles of snow, it was an excellent visit. We got to visit the cat barn. That was a cool, informative visit. I’m not a cat person but I enjoyed listening to Dale & Holly talk the science that backs their cat breeding program. We then headed to the goat barn to look at young wethers, the doe kids in the online sale and a couple of buck prospects. The bucks out of Top Gun x Facebook were intriguing. There was a pretty cool buck but I don’t think that he is leaving their farm. I don’t blame them. The online does are better in real life. This was a good stop and I look forward to coming back when there is green grass. We then centered to Dereu’s to look at the bucks that he’s selling online. Pair of interesting prospects that should sell well and could help a lot of breeding programs. Now on to the next phase of our big adventure. The real reason(s) that we are up here in the Land of Lincoln, a gold key combine tour on Tuesday morning. Can’t wait.