Inbred, linebred, stacking genetics, etc. Whatever you want to call it. Linebreeding goes on a lot in the stock show industry. Sometimes it works, sometimes it is as screwed up as a pile of coat hangers. Mike Kelly has obviously perfected the art of stacking 900 genetics. Some of them don’t look like they should work (Smokestack) but have thrown some really good kids.

I was recently spewing wisdom that I thought the 191 genetics could be stacked. I have a Joe Dirt daughter due to Joe Dirt in a week or two as an experiment. My theory was that the 900 was already stacked 3 times in Animal. Then 191’s momma was a full sister to Bingo. Joe Dirt’s momma was a Festus. A lot of Helms’ goats are 191 on a S100 daughter. S100 is an El Comandante. By having the Bingo, Festus and/or S100 genetics in there, you are bringing in a pile of maternal characteristics, structural correctness and overall balance. I had convinced myself that this would work and work well.

Then I go to Quitiquae,Tx to look at wethers. Kenneth shows us the buck prospects and there is a tag 507X that I love. He is a 191 back on a 191/100 daughter. Bingo, there he is and he’s good. Square made, smooth, bone, power, balance and an overall good look. Is he for sale? Not on that day. But yes, he’s going to be in the online sale. This is a buck that because of the stacked genetics, should work really well as an outcross if somebody doesn’t already have some 191 in their herd. Or it may work to stack them again if you already have a dose of 191. I don’t need another buck and I dang sure don’t won’t to spend any cash right now, but that prospect has my wheels spinning.

Nevertheless, I would bet that there are going to be several sets of double dirty babies around our place next season. It may work, it may not. But, we’ll find out.

Had a butt load of wind last night. Very little rain with it, but the wind was BRUTAL for a short period of time. Thankfully no damage. Just some wet feed in the feed troughs. It is amazing how a few leftover pellets of feed can swell up exponentially.

There are lots of things that I would like to do yet in life. I may not get to do these things, but I can dream.

1–Pet a Koala. That is a cool looking animal. Big fluffy ears. They are cool. Kela recently got to do this. I don’t think they would make a good pet, but I would like to pet one. Plus, I don’t have access to a lot of eucalyptus tree leaves to feed them.

2–I have always wanted to shoot a warthog. A mounted warthog on the wall wouldn’t be pretty, but it would be pretty neat.

3–Eat a penguin. How come you don’t see penguin on the menu anywhere. They look rather tasty. They may be fat, but then we would just need to smoke it or grill it to let the fat drip away. Shouldn’t be tough and stringy. They eat fish, so it should be clean. Not like a dang’d old catfish looking around eating whatever floats its way. Think about it the next time you see some nature program with these tasty looking birds shooting through the water. And what is always chasing a penguin? A seal. Why? Because seals know that these are tasty birds.

We survived a marathon trip to Texas this weekend. Gallagher had a really good set of goats and they sold really well. It was perfect weather Saturday morning for a goat sale. It didn’t get hot until later. As soon as the sale was over we headed to Cooper’s. Didn’t think about it being Memorial Day weekend. Wow, it was a LONG line! But we waited. They actually moved through it pretty quick though. The meat and beans was good, as always. Saw some interesting biker outfits.

Saw a tremendous set of buck prospects at Helms. Wow, they are good. There is 8 or 9 bucks in that deal that could help anybodys program. If you like goats with a square hip, wide, full loin, shapely rack, big ribcage, big ass, impecable balance, good structure and a killer look than you will like these bucks. Well worth your time to go look at them. Or don’t. Either way, they are going to sell extremely well. Which is good, because then Kenneth can afford to get his road fixed. I guess his road has been rooted up by all the wild hogs around there.

We did meet several people that work for various agencies of the Texas law enforcement system. Both were very nice. One thought my dim lights were too bright. He also talked about all of the wild hogs in the Texas panhandle. I guess you only see them when it rains, which isn’t very often. The other officer thought that Big Bill might be having a medical emergency since he clocked him at 93 mph. And Bill didn’t even get a written warning. Wow! I’ve never gotten out of a ticket for driving that fast. I don’t know what kind of story Bill told but it must have been a good one.

With respect to Mr. Milligan’s word of the day posts, I bring you Kelln’s word of this day–REPO. As in repossession.

I had traded for and subsequently sold a pair of swathers. I sold these swathers via the internet in mid April. The customer came to Woodward and hauled them back to northern Kansas. He wrote checks for both units. The problem was that the checks were like a hard hit grounder that caught a small rock in the infield and they BOUNCED. Bounced real high. These checks would have been nice to have on a cold winter day. Why? Because they would have kept you warm, as they were HOT. Since these units weren’t financed, we didn’t have a lien on them. Now, we had $40K worth of swathers six hours away.

Contact was made and they sent some money. Then a little more. Then a little bit more. Then nothing. No phone answers, no replies to e-mails. Nothing. Obviously, this made some of our administration people a little uneasy. I was hoping some money would show up, but nothing did. I didn’t have time for this kind of crap.

Fortunately for me, I grew up with a dad that was in the finance business. I have seen some repos. I even drove a couple of them in high school. One of them was a corvette. Then there was this 1982 short wide bed, 2wd, solid black chevy pickup with an AM radio, 3 on the tree tranny, inline 6 cylinder engine with glass packs. It sounded like a pissed off weed-eater. It didn’t have fuzzy dice on the mirror, but it should have.

Well, it was now time to either hire a lawyer or take care of it, myself. Any of you that know me understand that I am not afraid of a little confrontation. I can also be a devious SOB. I made a phone call or two and I not only had directions to his home, but his kids and his parents. Had a former student that was going to be in the area do a drive by and locate one of the machines this past weekend. Then I called the sheriff, just in case I got shot. I left the house early Tuesday morning and drove within a few miles of Nebraska. I quickly found the one machine. But not the other. I only needed to find one as he had sent enough money to cover one of them.

At this point, I could call my truck driver to come get it 6 hours away, which would cost some jack. Or I could get in the machine and drive it 20 miles to the nearest Deere dealer and park it. Which meant my pickup would be left behind. Or go find the guy and have a discussion about hot checks. Since I was a little pissed about driving 350 miles, I found the guy. I mean, I missed Law & Order, Sportscenter and Jed Castle’s channel 9 weather report in order to do this. I talked to him, then made him take me to the other machine. If I’m going to have to repo a machine, I want pick. Then we had another discussion about finances and not meeting financial obligations. He readily agreed that maybe he should sell something quick in order to come up with the money.

I am happy to report that this 700 mile round trip was not a wasted effort as he came up with the money. Too bad he didn’t raise good goats or I might have worked a trade.

No, I didn’t have a gun with me as I was in a company pickup. And in another state. But, as Thompson and Fred have said, they would rather go to prison and deal with all that goes on there then have to listen to me when I’m pissed. In other words, you probably wouldn’t want to be trapped in an elevator with me. Anyways, the money is collected, the customer has his swathers, maybe he lost a little dignity, but I lost a day of my life dealing with this crap. Oh well.

Don’t write bad checks. It is the same as lying.

This story reminds me of the one time that I had a bounced check for a goat. That wether became known as Repo Joe. We’ll save that story for another day.

I have really liked the wether feed bill the past two months. Why? Because there hasn’t been hardly any wethers on feed at our house. But, that is getting ready to change. I think all of the kids were glad to have a break after OYE with no wethers to exercise, but now the kids are starting to get a little antsy wondering when I’m going to have some goats for them. Braden is constantly wanting to know if I’ve found one for him and when I’m going to look. Both Taylor girls hit me up this past week. Their pens are empty and they need goats.

I’ve normally bought a lot of wethers by now, but this year has been different. I couldn’t go to Kelly’s sale as that was when Kela was leaving for Australia. Didn’t like some others, so I didn’t try to buy them. My next set and Tyke’s won’t be ready to wean till middle of June. Helm’s doesn’t start selling until June. Gallagher is having a sale this weekend. I will try to purchase something there, but it might get a little high.

I will put a lot of emphasis on buying wethers from breeders that are involved in the Lone Star Elite and Champion’s Choice jackpot. Those shows are well worth it.

Duke has a Rainman wether from Poe on feed and that is it. I thought he might weigh in the mid 60s. Big Bill told me that I was full of crap, so we weighed him yesterday. I was wrong. He weighed 77. So that goat isn’t eating a whole lot now for a while.

The busiest goat buying time of the year is rapidly approaching. I’m ready for it because it means that 1–I’m addicted to the thrill of the hunt and 2–I will soon be eating at Cooper’s BBQ in Llano. Yes!!

One of the most common questions that I am asked is “How much money do I need to spend?” This is a dang near impossible question for me to answer. Only you can answer it, but first you have to answer several questions.

1–How much money can I budget for it?

2–What are our goals?

3–Will we actually work hard enough, show properly, take care of business to achieve those goals and justify spending this money?

It is hard for people to honestly answer question #3, but it is the most important. If the work isn’t going to get done, don’t spend a pile of cash.

If somebody tells me that they want three wethers for a combined total of $1,500, I tell them they are better off with two for $1,500. Buy one that I have confidence in and one that is a little greener but has the right genetics & design, and therefore has a chance.

Sometimes, you have to spend money to make money. I don’t like buying wethers for 2 or 3 thousand dollars apiece. But I know that Duke will get them fed and shown properly and therefore he can hold his money together. Fortunately, he makes money at this game. Now, I have been known to lose some. But if it is money spent on a kid, it was money well spent. An investment in the future.

I have also noticed that good ones are cheaper to feed. Why? Because you aren’t trying every dang voodoo top dress to get them to pop muscle or walk better or fix whatever problem they have. The good ones just need proper feed, exercise and work.

Obviously, I have been spending a lot of time at work. It is good to be busy, especially after the past two years of little rain. The Dragon Lady has been taking care of does and kids. I’ve been doing the rest in the dark in the morning and in the dark of an evening.

Yesterday, an empty semi rolls into the store yard right at 8 am. He came in with a copy of a purchase order. He was from Minnesota and was to pick up a 12 row corn header that I sold a dealer in Minnesota back in March. We weren’t expecting a truck that morning and were somewhat unprepared to load him.

The corn header was sitting on a header trailer on the north end of the lot. We only had two combines on the lot. One in the shop with the feeder house off. This meant I couldn’t use that one. Another older combine was in line to go into the shop. It had the right feederhouse attachment to fit the corn head, but it might not have enough lift to pick it up. For those that don’t know, a 12 row corn header weighs a lot and is designed for newer, bigger combines. A 9610 combine like the one I was going to try to use is better suited for an 8 row header. But I was determined to try it. It would take two big forklifts to pick it up if this combine couldn’t do it. And we have one big one and one little forklift. I really needed this combine to work.

I pulled the trailer out front with my pickup. I lined the combine up and got the feederhouse hooked up. I hit the hydraulics to start to lift. It was picking it up. The truck driver was watching the clearance from the header to the trailer. I got it lifted as high as it would go. The driver was still signaling for me to lift it higher. I gave it more rpms and hit the lift button some more. The ass end of the combine was a little light. There wasn’t any more lift. I crawled off the combine and examined the situation. I might be able to just put it in reverse and drag the header off the trailer. Nope, there was still too much weight on the trailer. The trailer just drug with it.

I climbed off again. It looked like I only needed a couple of inches and I could get the trailer out from under it. Jake, one of our mechanics, walked out to see what I was getting ready to screw up. He asked, “What are you thinking?” I said, “Two inches and I could pull the trailer forward and be clear of the trailer. Let’s flatten the trailer tires.” He got a valve stem remover and we made all four tires flat. I slowly pulled the trailer out from under the header. We were free.

Luckily, the semi trailer was a low deck detach trailer, so I just drove the combine up to it and sat the header down on it. Problem solved. Now, we just had to air the tires back up on the header trailer. Such is life in my world. Probably wasn’t the ideal method, but it worked.

It is a sunny May day with temperatures nearing 90 degrees. It is 2:30 in the afternoon. Mandy, the secretary, is gone to lunch. That means that there is no line of defense for my office. A man walks through the front doors, looks at her empty desk and then turns and looks into my office. I make eye contact with him. Oh crap! Here he comes.

He walks through the door of my office, clutching a newspaper in one hand. He is probably in his mid sixties. 5’5″ and a 140 pounds with gray hair and a scraggly unkept gray beard that probably had some varmints living in it. He was wearing Carhart bib coveralls with no shirt. Did I mention that it was 90 degrees?

“You hiring here?”, he asked. I answered, “No. We filled the position yesterday.” He said, “This paper says you have a job open.” I said, “That must be a paper from last week.” He said it was but he wanted to fill out an application anyway.

I went to Mandy’s desk to get an app to give him. He came and stood near me. He obviously did not believe in bathing, brushing teeth or wiping as he stunk like a gutshot skunk. He told me that everybody in town was hiring, even Wal-Mart. He came to town because everybody was hiring and he was ready for a job.

He said, “You all had a tornado come through here didn’tya?” I said, “On the other side of town.” From this statement, I deduced that he was not from here. I thought he might have been an oilfield hand of some sort. I asked, “Where you from?” He replied, “Mooreland.”

For those of you that don’t know, Mooreland is 10 miles from Woodward. TEN!! At this point, I wasn’t sure what I was dealing with and I couldn’t breathe from the maliforous odor. I bid him good day. I hope he gets a job at Wal Mart.

Several tips when applying for a job. 1–Bathe. 2–Dress appropriately. Carhart bib coveralls with no shirt is not appropriate.

After thinking about it, I’m pretty sure that this guy was an OU fan.

I haven’t seen any combines yet, but it won’t be long. There is wheat that is really close to being ready around Alva, Fairview and Okeene. It is probably two weeks away out west and also over by Enid. Most of the canola has been swathed and there is a lot of corn coming up. Judging by all the rye springing up in the wheat, there will probably be more acres of canola planted next year in order to try and get rid of the rye.

It has been hectic the last few weeks. Late or no lunch breaks, start early, leave late. I’ve been trying to hire another parts person to help out. I was out of the office Wednesday, but had an applicant come in. Our parts manager talked to him, then called me. The guy had 23 years of ag mechanics experience in Mississippi. I said, “Put him on the phone.” I told him to come in Thursday morning to chat. He asked if it was okay to stay and help out so that he could get a feel for our dealership. I asked, “For free?” He said, “Yes.” I said, “As long as my parts manager is with you, fine. Have at it.”

Thursday morning, the parts guys and I chatted about this applicant. They thought he had a chance to be a good one. So I interviewed him yesterday, asked a pile of questions and made a few observations. He was shaved bald headed. Had a big tattoo on each arm and was blind in one eye. I always like a story.

He tells me that one tattoo is in rememberance of his mother. The other signifies when he was saved by Jesus. All right, cool. I’m always in on a deal for moms and Jesus. He offered to wear long sleeve shirts to keep the tats covered. I’m not against tats but some are. Okay. Now about that eye?

He said, “Daddy was violent and he beat mom. When I was eight, I stepped in to protect her. I ended up getting facial surgery and have been blind in that eye ever since.” This dude is loaded with stories. I kept asking questions. He kept answering them. I told him we would talk again as long as things checked out.

Guess what? They didn’t. I will just throw a few terms out that would include aliases, felonies, misdemeanors, no driver’s license, etc, etc. Guess what else? He wasn’t from Mississippi.

Now, I’m no angel and I’m not to worried about somebodies past, but I don’t like being lied to right from the start. So I called him today and confronted him about it. He admitted lying, then told me another lie and I then told him not to bother coming back to talk to me. He then said, “Great, I caught my wife with another guy this morning, now this.” What? He had told us that his wife was pregnant and due shortly. My head is spinning now.

Sometimes, it is good to be in a pen of goats with nothing else going on.

And, I’m still looking for a new employee.