-igan and dang disconcerting

I’ve been several thousand miles the past couple of weeks, chasing several species of animals.  But I have noticed that the two comedians that make me belly laugh, every time that I hear them, both end in  -igan.  That would be Jim Gaffigan and Kathleen Madigan.  Those two humans can bring some funny to the xm radio.  They both have a bit of Irish and I would bet a bit of Catholic. (a LOT)   But dang, they are funny.  And for the most part, clean humor.  But, not always.  She also mentions goats during several routines.

Foxworthy, Larry the Cable Guy and Ron White are legendary.  Everyone can listen to Foxworthy, most can listen to Larry the Cable Guy and well, Ron White might be the funniest of them all, but Tammy doesn’t like him.  One of the funniest things that I ever heard on the radio was Foxworthy hosting Ron White with a studio audience.  People asked questions and they answered.  Foxworthy answered properly.  Ron White answered just like you expected him to do so.  The stories were awesome!

While listening to that interview, I asked Duke if he wanted to drive.

He replied, “Dad, I can’t.  I have tears in my eyes.”  Me too.

Eddie Murphy, Damon Wayons and Richard Pryor still make me laugh.  Gabriel Iglesias is one that I would like to see live.  George Carlin still makes me think and at times, makes me think that I want to turn the channel.  I wish that I had seen Mel Tillis live.

Speaking of jokes.  I made a screaming trip south to pick up a couple of projects for students.  I stopped in Abilene to get a bite to eat.  I hadn’t been to an Olive Garden in a year or so.  I pulled in, got a table for ONE and ordered.  The waiter brought me the usual bowl of salad and a basket of breadsticks.  Now, I really like the salad and breadsticks at an Olive Garden.

But, I was like “Dude, it is just me.  You couldn’t bring a smaller portion?”

His reply, “The salads and bread baskets are already made up.  We bring them regardless of the # of people.  We can always bring more?”

WTH?  I am the fattest that I have ever been.  But dang dude.  Let’s not waste food.  I did as I ate a 2nd portion of salad and only ate 2 breadsticks. (could have eaten ALL of them, but didn’t)

So, I watched the people around me.  And here is what I saw.  Lots of tattoos, lots of ill fitting clothes and I look skinny compared to most.  I am not against a tattoo or two (that is fun to say) but DAMN!  I am also not against some tight fitting clothing and visible skin on some women….but DANG….put that stuff away.  When I think of biscuits and muffins, I want to be thinking about a breakfast food.

I watched the couple next to me get cheese on their salad.  They put so much cheese on the salad that I decided to time it when they, especially her, said “YES” to cheese on their entree.  The waiter ran out of cheese. I shit you not!  My timer was approaching the greater part of a minute and their lasagna was no longer visible under the heaping pile of grated cheese.  They waited while the waiter called for reinforcements.  I am real sure that they did not go for a walk after their dinner.

Speaking of disconcerting.   I have noticed that a large number of smaller TX towns no longer have a Dairy Queen.  That means no slow service, dirty bathrooms and…wait….what?  I really liked their ice cream products and could rely on their burgers to make me want to find a dirty bathroom at the next town.  DQs have been a staple of TX towns with a population of 2,500 or more.

Peanut Buster Parfaits, hunger buster burgers, dilly bars.

Dilly bars–“Here give these to the men to play with in lieu of other things.”

And now, the last three McDonald’s that I have visited have been without ketchup, unsweet tea and have been slow of service.  When MickeyD’s ship ain’t floating efficiently, well, it makes one wonder.  Some entities can get too big. And that opens the doors for somebody else.

Like a DQ butterfinger blizzard, it’s all good.


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