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Staying Hooked!

I’ve not been as busy as normal.  But I also haven’t been sitting around eating bon-bons. I haven’t been fishing…yet.  But, it is on the horizon.  I’ve kidded out does, managed stock and trying to keep some first-timers milking and raising kids properly.  Not always easy.  I need to wean two sets of calves, but I’ve got to haul a couple to the butcher in order to make room.  I will be honest.  I take after my dad when it comes time to feed calves.  I like looking at fat cattle.  Better yet, I like eating those tasty dudes.

We have yet to be hit hard by the rona virus in this part of the world.  It very may well be coming.  But, the lack of oilfield activity has crippled western Oklahoma and the Texas panhandle.

I have watched some of The Ranch and several of Peyton’s Places.  Fired up ol’ smokey today.  Supper of baby back ribs, garlic/butter red taters, carrots and fresh bread—–ooooohhhh, yeah!!!!   Probably going to do it again later this week.

Speaking of staying hooked.  The Shattuck Venture grocery store is off-the-hook wicked awesome.  Those cats have managed to keep shelves stocked and people served.  Customers have been driving over 120 miles to come to this grocery store.  Why?  Because they have meat, milk, bread, toilet paper and damn neart everything else that you are looking to buy.  These guys are hustling to get trucks from wherever and working all night to unload.  Wal Mart is running low on supplies???  I wouldn’t know.  I do know that these hustlers are busting their ass.  I’m sure that they are making money but our community, county and area has a place to go get our products.  As an added bonus, these cats work great to help the Shattuck FFA.  If your grocery supplier isn’t keeping shelves stock, they need to be taking notes from this crew.  They are staying hooked!


Stay healthy.  Stay busy and stay hooked.  Have a good one and a better tomorrow.


Where to go?  I don’t know how to write anything anymore.  My mind stays whirling, kind of like a limited slip differential in mud.  One tire is spinning but the other one….

I don’t know what to think about how to market show stock in the current climate.  It’s going to get better…but when.  Well photographed hair still seems to sell well in the goat world.

On that note, aren’t there enough of us that remember glamour shots and how hair, makeup, lighting and camera angles can make one look better than they normally do?  I don’t get it.  The sheep people don’t even shear these young uns when they photo them.  Normally in a pen with straw as the footing.  The hog jocks might only snap one picture with a head up and nothing else, standing in wood chips.  The cattle jocks, the people that invented all of this clipping, fitting, videoing, and dolling up crap…they don’t do anything special to get their show stock ready to sell.  A minute long video of a clipped calf walking across a pen.  BUT,  these goat deals have to be glamoured to the hilt.  Why is that?  Way To Go goat folks.

I have seen several posts that involve an excerpt from a Dean Koontz book from 1981.  Supposedly, this dude either knew what was coming, had a great imagination or just wrote a coincidence.  I don’t know.  I haven’t actually read the book just the excerpts that apply to today.

There is another book from some little known author named Stephen King.  Yeah, that Stephen King.  The scary movie kingpin that also had something to do with one of the best damn movies ever–The Shawshank Redemption.  Since you all have time, I recommend that you read his book “The Stand”.  Or go find the mini-series on some tv deal.  It isn’t specific as to time and virus type but IT will make you think WTF is going on today.  I actually like a lot of his writings, even though I don’t like scary crap.  His stuff makes you think, it ties to real situations and normally involves a religious background while being non-denominational or political.  Even though one will be thinking about religion and political affiliations.  Way To Go!


Now, Where To Go?   How about a joke?  Kind of clean.  But, relevant to the times.

A suspected covid-19 patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose.  A young, female nurse student appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.

“Nurse”, he mumbles from behind the mask.  “Are my testicles black?’

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, “I don’t know.  Sir, I’m only here to wash your upper body and feet.”

He struggles to ask again, “Nurse, please check for me.  Are my testicles black?”

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she  overcomes her embarassement and pulls back the covers.

She raises his gown, holds his manhood in on hand and his testicles gently in the other.  She looks very closely and says, “There’s nothing wrong with them.  Sir, they look fine.”

The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly.  “Thank you very much.  That was wonderful.  Now listen very closely–            Are  -my-  -test-  -results-  back?”

That story does not mean that you should wear a mask HOPING for somebody to misunderstand you.


Intro to History 1014

High school, college, whatever….we have all had a history lesson or two.  We need to study history.  Heck, currently, we are all learning more about the Spanish Flu of 1918.  I am sure that I am not the only one that does not remember learning about this crap.  Is it real?  IDK.

Saw a book face post this morning of a 101 year old survivor of the Spanish Flu, World War I & II.  I didn’t even need batteries in the calculator to go 2020 minus 101 only gets us to 1919.  World War I ended in 1918 and the Spanish Flu of 1918 was in, you guessed it…1918.  IDK.  Maybe there is too much info available today.

On a goat note.  I love the history of the current show goat industry.  I remember fondly the days of the mid 2000s when this deal was starting to spread like a pandemic across Texas and then Oklahoma and then took off from there.  The goats are better now but I enjoyed the people of those fond memory days.

I got a call from Izzy this morning.  Yeah, that Izzy that was won more major banners than any of you young-uns can fathom.  Hadn’t talked to him in a while.  Excellent livestock dude.

I liked the days before the internet and social media took over.  I can still survive but it was funner back then.  I’m old.  I get it.  But I still remember…..

My first couple of encounters with a south Texas bump gate.

Meeting up with Ralph Shafer at Rosa’s Casita in El Dorado, TX.  I loved those luncheons.

Asking Claire Powell what that doe was out of–“You going to pay for papers?”


Her–“Well, she is out of a damn good Powell/Holman buck and that’s all that matters.”

Me–“Yes, ma’am!”

Her–“While you’re at it, bring several beers.”

Me–“Yes, MA’AM!”


That mis-spelled “wethesr sale” sign that they used to put on the highway south of Sonora to go to Tommy Morriss’ sale.

Buying yearling does at Harbour’s.

Learning how to get tail’s to stay up.

Festivities at Lex Lehmberg’s.

Gallagher’s when they were just some goat breeders west of Mason, TX that were trying to make a good one.

Bob Allen & Preston Farris sales with the sprinklers on the tin roof to try to cool things under 120 effing degrees.

Raff with his cane, gold rope chain and wife beater shirt.  Me–“What’s that buck kid?”  Him– “I don’t know.”

Me–“What?  How the hell do you not know what that one is?”  Him–“I don’t know.”   Me–“WTF??!!”

“Wait, WTF?  Is I Don’t Know his name?”


Tyke will remember a trip to Norman Kohl’s.  Norman was going off about some cult.  It wasn’t long till we saw that stuff on the news.

Literally, going to the border crossing, then left a block to Border Boers.

Lunch at Galvan’s in Turkey, TX.  I miss those.

In 2006, when I first met some dude from California that was going to haul some left-over wethers west.  Met him in a parking lot at OYE.  “If these things win anything, I’ll call you and let you know if we will ever do business again.”  Been putting critters on his trailer’s ever since.


And then there is the time that I hauled a goat marketing legend on a trip with me.  We made several goat stops.  Then, I made a stop to look at some sheep.  He–WTF?  Why?         Me–“Shut the F up and wait.  It will be worth your stop.”    And then we heard the best goat history lesson EVER!!!!  He won’t argue.


Those of you that know me, now realize, that all of these stories should be told while I am either sitting on a 5 gallon bucket or leaning on a gator.  This is the abbreviated versions.

I opened a list of goat semen that was in a semen tank this morning.  WAIT?  WHAT?  RUSM?  HOW IN THE HELLLLL????  Wait, I owned that one and I didn’t collect him!!!  That one sired that….oh my, what would this stuff have been worth 10 years ago, 5 years ago.

Grands at majors, direct 900 sons, maybe some of the highest producing females ever, holy jeeminy, this tank of juice has direct ties to all of the current big names.

Not sure how this is all going to go down.  There are a couple hundred straws of this stuff.  It won’t be high $ but could still hit.  Won’t be many pictures, just a history lesson.  No doubt, March 2020 has been the strangest month of my life.  Your life. All of us need a change.

I’m ready for April 1.



You clowns thought that I was going to write about that Tiger King stuff that is blowing up social media.  One would have to have a netflix account in order to watch that stuff.  This is a safe house.

On a goat note, I got some pics sent to me of baby goats being born out of a flush from Next Friday and a wicked, proven doe.  I like the color.  Maybe, a Tiger King buck coming soon.  Not mine to name.

This Saturday was one miserable SOB to be outside.  The wind was howling like a tiger at feeding time.  OOHHHH!!! It was miserable.

I am waiting to go back out tonight to do chores.  The wind is “supposed” to die down in a bit.  I know of two doors that I have to replace from the wind today.

As I am waiting, there is a movie on the tube.  Yes, the best movie that ever had a song tied to a tiger.  Rocky III.  One of the best movie songs of ALL TIME–The Eye of the Tiger.  Maybe the worst Rocky movie with Maybe the best movie song of all time.  Maybe not.  This day just seems to start and end with tigers.

Well, I may have access to a netflix account.  So, I may have watched some Tiger King shows.  I may have watched episodes 1 & 2 on Thursday night.  Episode 3 last night and then, well, I don’t sleep long.  So, I watched 4,5,6 & 7 before the sun came up today.  HOLY exotic crap!!  You can’t make this stuff up.

And after watching all of this, I find it hard to believe that the absurd, gay, polygamist, that wears a gun(s), admitted to euthanizing tigers, who also ran for president and governor and the whole piercing stuff and……is currently serving time, is the person that I trust the most after watching this crap.  That chick is guilty.  The others are a bunch of thieves, crooks and con artists.  It’s so screwed up that the producer that was making a docuseries about Joe Exotic is now just a part of the series.

Hunh???  How would the goat game play out in a series like this?  It wouldn’t look good on tv.  Think about who fits what role.  I’m not queer, a polygamist, haven’t shot a tiger, ran for political office, no piercings or tattoos.   I don’t even like cats.  However, I do like that Rocky III song.  I am guilty of playing that song LOUD!!!

Slow the roll of this wind.  Stop the corona.  Help others.  Do some random acts of kindness.  Help.  Pray.  And remember to vote.  Like a tiger, we need fresh meat.  No incumbents.  Term limits-2 years and 2 terms–all senate and house seats.  Limit pay and benefits.  Make legislators hungry to be there.  No fat cats.


P.S.  And from the you can’t make this stuff up file.  As I hit the publish button, the next tune on iTunes was from one of my favorite 80s bands—White Lion with the song “Little Fighter”.  Not sure what that means but I like it.



Not just another Thursday.  This day brings milestones to the Kelln piece of paradise.  Today, brings the anniversary since I last drank a soda pop.  I wasn’t addicted but I did like a jazzed up Mountain Dew.  Nothing for the last year.  It’s amazing how a hip out of place will change your life.  I now drink a LOT of water and I pee A LOT!!!

I moved a doe with twin kids out of the kidding barn.  I put them in a run in the wether barn.  It is now official.  We are done showing once you put a doe in the wether barn.  This may not seem abnormal to some but those that know Tammy and I realize this is a big deal.  So, NO!  We will not be hosting any foreign exchange students or adopting kids.  Our show careers are DONE!!  We just want to help.

Most importantly, we got our first letter from a future Marine.  It was short but actually well written.  I wasn’t expecting a novel.  There was no doubt that Duke wrote the letter.

I don’t know much.  But I do know these few things.  ESPN owes Tom Brady a stake in the company.  If it wasn’t for him, they wouldn’t have had a thing to talk about for the last 2 weeks.  I hate the end of this school year.  I don’t like proms but I wanted to see a group of kids finish their baseball, speaking,  showing, judging, etc careers.  I’m pleased with our school administration is going forward.

No corona here.  Hoping and praying that all of you are corona free.  Good luck. Horseshoes & shamrocks to all.  Unchartered waters.  This deal is effedUP!  Pray and well, pray again.  It can’t hurt.

Tough Swimming

I will be honest.  The last several days have kind of kicked the heck out of me.  No, I haven’t had classes but I have been busy with this ag teaching gig.  The Shattuck school administration has been busy trying to prepare for this shit-show that we are currently experiencing.  This is a time of year when I am happy to be busy–kids working on CDEs, speeches, getting ready for convention and banquet–all while gathering calves, sheep and some goats for NEXT year.  But not this year.  We are all in new territory and this makes my mind swim.

Then,  throw in a former student that died this past weekend.  And now, shit gets tough.  Tammy and I have been working with the family.  No he didn’t die from the corona BS.  It couldn’t be that easy.  This kid wasn’t the best student ever.  But, he was one helluva of an ag mecher.  He was the kid that sold a lot of Blue & Gold, helped at every community service project, would gladly clean the shop and when he got his turn working in the shop, then he shined.  He was the best torch operator that I have dealt with and he was left-handed.  His buddies called him “The man with golden torch hand.”   When Shattuck FFA went to winning a bunch of these ag mech type deals, AJ was the offensive lineman that paved the way.  I delivered a pile of plaques to his mom that he won for us.  This stuff isn’t fun.   It’s tough swimming.

But, there have been bright moments.   AJ had built a WICKED bad ass horseshoe cross.  It won a division at Woodward District.  Then it was RESERVE GRAND overall at the State Fair of OK.  And it won a division at the Tulsa State Fair.  The Shattuck FFA donated it to the NW Cattleman’s Scholarship Ball.  It sold well.  When he was building this cross, he took up a whole 4’x8′ shop table and warned all–“I will beat anybody that touches this deal!”    13 horseshoes and about 250 horseshoe nails.  It was WICKED!!

This week, I contacted the buyer of this WICKED cross.  I told them that I needed to buy it back or build them a replacement.  They asked why, so I told them.  WICKED HUGE thanks to Austin Vanderwork and Farm Credit of Western Oklahoma for giving this piece of art back to the family.  In this part of Oklahoma, we have some wicked awesome supporters.

Now for the fun shit!!    Duke and this kid were buds.  Do I send a message?  Tammy and I along with AJ’s family decided to wait.  DAMN!!  Now, I am hoping that the corona stuff is done by June.  Then, we can go to Duke’s graduation, hug him and then tell him this news.

All of a sudden, goat sales in June don’t seem that important.

It is all going to work out in the end.  However, I am already well-known to be a surly bastard.  Now, add that my mind is swimming uphill.  Basically, here is a recipe that includes this corona shit, add this deal and I am now HOPING that we get to go to San Diego in June for a graduation, after which, a newly trained Marine may whip my ass for holding out info AND I hope that it is that easy.

I’ve had better days and better weeks but it could be worse.

Have a good one and a better tomorrow.  Here’s to horseshoes, horseshoe nails, good welders, wicked torch hands, RARE ribeyes at Cattleman’s, beards in 8th grade and being a bud.  Shamrocks dudes!!!


Corona….not here!

I haven’t had a Corona in years.

While in quarantine, we did wash, clip and photo a bunch of yearling bucks as well as some winter born kids.  I really like one of these bucks.  He is the biggest chested, busted open ribcage, squarest racked and big center loined deals that I have ever handled.  I like him.

Friday night, I gave a speech to Blaine Rue about growing your own.  Grow your own customers, grow your showman, whatever.  I can personally testify to the value of growing your own.  I have witnessed the friendships forged from a group of kids that grew up in the barn together.  A couple of weeks ago, Tammy and I had to take Duke and turn him over to the Marines.  Braden Schovanec, Chesley Comstock and Lexi Vanderwork met us at the hotel.  It’s hard to read Duke Kelln.  (not sure where he gets it)  But, I can tell you that he was amped that those people were there for him.

Saturday morning, Blaine got to see the next generation of helpers.  Ol’ Kelln had a crew of sheep showman ready to work.  Washing, drying and setting up.  Ask Kratzer about this crew.  Clayton Washmon is a work horse.  And these Spillman twins are young but willing to work.  Wicked!!  I will guarantee you that a couple of these bucks have the cleanest nuts that have ever been offered.

These twins are 9 years old.  They had an issue in school a couple of weeks ago. Their principal told me this story.  During the pledge of allegiance, a classmate wouldn’t stand and salute.  One of them said, “You better salute or you might go to hell.”  The other one, said “You’d get your ass whipped at my house for not saluting the U.S. flag.”  Needless to say that I like these kids.

No, I don’t know where the goat market is headed but I do think that we will see some of these bullshit online sales exposed.  I also think that….well, that will go in a later post.

As for my social distancing, (I have been preparing for this my whole life).  I did watch a video of Steve Martin playing a banjo and I watched a video of Neil Diamond playing a parody of “Sweet Caroline”, something about washing hands.  And how about the Gambler passing away.  I have always been a fan of Kenny Rogers.  In this current marketplace, we will see some fold em, some that know when to walk away and some of us that just push all in.

On an evening of Tammy and I learning how to coexist with no kids at home.  She cooked a mini herf roast with taters and carrots.  DAMN GOOD!   We watched the Tom Hanks movie (he has the corona)  A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood.  I wasn’t expecting that movie to be so dark.  But, dang , that is a good flick.  Is he the best actor ever?

I guess that I have the next 2 weeks off from teaching.  Okay!  You can find me at the ag building or looking at stock for next year.

Prayers, horseshoes & shamrocks!!   Oh,… and cheers!



2 N the same day

I have not been the most prolific blogger for the past couple of months.  There has been plenty to write about but I haven’t made time.  Now, I have time.

Several OYE stories.

On the Saturday morning of the doe show, one of my prize 8th graders had washed and dried his doe.  He was standing in the middle of the busy aisle that leads from one barn to the next.  He waited until it was crowded around him and then he started coughing.  I mean coughing hard.  Then, he loudly says “I’ve had this cough ever since I got back from that trip to China last month.”  The crowd parted and moved away from him.  This turd!  I shook my head, chewed his ass and then later laughed about it.

On Sunday afternoon, Washmon, Schoovy and I were standing by the Shattuck sheep pens.  A teenage boy came around the corner pulling a little red wagon.  The wagon was filled with sprite, dr. pepper, coke and school fundraiser chocolate bars.  The boy made eye-contact with me and he asked, “Sir, would you like to buy a pop or candy bar to support my school?”

I said, “I don’t drink pop and I don’t eat much chocolate.”

He said, “You a diabetic?”

“No, I just don’t need the stuff.”

“You allergic to it?”

“No.  I gave up pop a year ago and I’m not a chocolate addict.  However, if you have a Payday in there, I’m a buyer.”

“No sir, no paydays.  But, this dark chocolate bar is really tasty and good for digestion.  You want one?”

“No.  How old are you?”

“14 sir.”

At this point, Schoovy & Washmon tune in to this conversation.  Schoovy leans in, hat cockeyed and says, “I might buy some product from you but I have one question for you.  You a democrat or republican?”

This future entrepreneur looks him dead in the eye, goes psshtt “You think some democrat would be pulling this wagon around this place trying to earn a dollar or two?  They would be sitting around waiting on a free candy bar.  Mister, I’m a future republican voter. ”

Washmon then asks if the pop is part of the school fundraiser.  “No sir, that’s my gas money to get here.”

I then asked where he was from.


I said, “I thought that area was in quarantine.”

“No sir. That’s Tulsa.  We are tougher than those people.”

He made some cash at that stop from Schoovy and Washmon.  Before he pulled his wagon to the next aisle, he looked at me and said, “Since I couldn’t sell you a pop or candy bar can I interest you in a N95 mask?  They are hard to come by and I have a stash of five of them for sale.”

Who says the future doesn’t look bright?  That kid has a chance.

No matter the situation, there is normally a way to make a dollar or two.

I heard this today.  With the current economic situation, democrats point out the plunging stock market and exclaim how it is all the Trumpster’s fault.  On the other side, Republicans look at the current stock prices and go “Ooohh, name brand stocks are on sale!”

I wish that there was not such a divide in our current politics, but it is what it is.

With everything going on in today’s society, I am a bit concerned about the upcoming goat market.  With the cancellation of the biggest market shows in the industry and several big live auctions being cancelled, one has to be concerned.  Although, it looks like some deals are recession proof.  That, or they just aren’t real.  IDK.


People, it is St. Patrick’s Day!  I am wearing my Lucky Charms t shirt, a quiet man cap that my parents bought for me in Ireland and some underwear with 4 leaf clovers.  I bet that doesn’t help.  I do not have any Tullamore Dew Irish Whiskey.  Nonetheless, cheers to you and yours.

Here’s a few Irish toasts that I think are cool, fit the livestock industry and well, I just like them.

–May your giving hand never fail you.  (the last week in OK and TX has seen a lot of people giving to make these deals kind of work–Thanks to all.)

–Dung hills rise and castles fall, we are all equal one and all.

–Here’s to a long life and a merry one. A quick death and an easy one. A pretty girl and an honest one. A cold beer-and another one!  (this one seems to fit the Kelln operation.)


–Here’s to cheating, stealing, fighting and drinking.  If you cheat, may you cheat death.  If you steal, may you steal a woman’s heart.  If you fight, may you fight for a brother.  If you drink, may you drink with me.


Here’s to horseshoes & shamrocks.  May tomorrow be better than today.

Just remember, it could be worse.  We could know somebody that actually has corona virus.



So, so many thoughts.  It’s been a long, long, long time since I’ve had any kind of spring break.  Now, I guess I’ve got one until April 6.

Huge thank you to all of the crew that runs the Oklahoma Youth Expo.  They were doing their very, very best to get through this show.  The current climate in the world is what finally shut them down.

Sunday evening, I knew that the plug was getting ready to be pulled.  I had just settled in to a steaming hot bath at the Hampton Inn.  I was going to soak this bad hip and bad hoof of mine.  I was sending texts to stop Shattuck showmen from heading to OYE with wether goats and steers and coordinating equipment load out for Monday morning.  Then, I got a panic call that they were going to let us show commercial ewes on Sunday night!  And they were starting in 15 minutes.  $h!t!!!!!!  Washmon has a good one in class 1.  They were in a restaurant so another family got her up and started getting her ready.  We converged back at the fairgrounds just in time to head to the ring.  Good thing we made it.  Clayton won class 1 and then ended up reserve grand.  That show ended before midnight.

OYE is well known for a strict dress code for showman.  It is always impressive to see the blue & gold and green & white on these well dressed exhibitors.  Not, in the ewe show.  Whatever clothes you had on were good enough this time.

Then, they let all the seniors come in for one class of showmanship.  “Thunderstruck” played as the seniors came into the ring.  I would be lying if I told you that I didn’t have to hold back a tear.  Pretty cool.

Meanwhile, across the street in the hog barn.  A group organized an “underground” barrow jackpot.  It started at 12:01 am.  They “only” had about 1,100 barrows show in this show.  I went and watched for awhile.  This show was kind of like the movie Fight Club.  The first rule of underground hog shows is that we don’t talk about underground hog shows.  Even though, it was held silently, there was a big crowd to witness this event.  And it went smooth.

As I went from show to show on Sunday night/Monday morning, the R.E.M. lyrics kept rolling through my skull…It’s the end of the world as we know it….   It was all kind of a surreal setting.  People weren’t happy, but they weren’t mad.  There were lots of jokes and discussions about coronavirus and toilet paper.  All in all, I absolutely loved the way the stock show world handled this crisis.  Everybody did the best that they could for the kids and worked together.  It is what it is.

Okies and Texans are both having to deal with an abrupt end to the stock show year.  It sucks for the kids, the breeders, the parents, the shows, the hotels, the restaurants, the vendors and the list goes on and on.

I talked to a dad on Sunday night.  He was a senior in 1985 when the pseudorabies outbreak shut down the pig shows that March.  Now, his daughter is a senior in 2020 when the coronavirus shut down the shows.  It ain’t cool.  But, it is what it is.

But they did get to have the first ever OYE ag mechanics show.  I am really proud of the Shattuck kids and their work.  We ended up winning the decorative division, the wildlife division and was reserve in the trailer division.  Our dump trailer was named Reserve Grand overall.  We got beat by a really good gooseneck trailer.  The top end of the projects were really good.  And then the prizes, our kids came home with 3 new Makita chop saws, a grinder set, a John Deere upright air compressor and 2 Lincoln plasma cutters as well as some cash.  And we still have these exhibits to sell.

In closing, THANK YOU to OYE for doing what you do, doing what you could do during tough times and adding the ag mechanics show.  Thanks.



Pray for our kids.

Pray for our way of life.

Pray for our troops.

Pray for agriculture.

Pray for common sense.

Pray for each other.

Pray for our leaders.

Pray against evil.

Pray for our nation.

Pray for our future.


I’ve only got one thing to say.

It is time to pray.